Sunday, July 8, 2012

Sunday Thoughts: My New Calling

A couple of weeks ago, I was given a new calling at church.  I was pretty surprised, seeing as how we've only been going to our current ward for five months and David and I had already received callings to be on the missionary committee.  At any rate, they released me from the committee and called me to work in the nursery.

As my husband only knows so well, the very last calling in the world that I wanted was to work in the nursery.

Don't get me wrong; I absolutely love children.  (Well, most of them.)  I love playing games and building with blocks and reading books.  But you know what?  That's my whole life.  Every single day of my life, every single moment that my son is awake, is devoted to playing and building and reading and singing and wiping snot and giving snuggles and tickling and cleaning and pulling crayons out of a little mouth... you get my point.  And while I love it with all my heart, I was really looking forward to the two hours of peace each week that came with James finally being able to go back to nursery.

James spent two months in nursery -- from ages 12 to 14 months -- when we were in our ward in Provo.  Moving here, the nursery is split into three classes because there are so many children, so they absolutely refused to let James in early.  We spent the first four months that we lived here wrestling a child through three hours of church (rather than just one) because he was already used to being able to go play while we attended our other meetings.  Just a little more than a month ago, he hit 18 months and was allowed back into nursery.  Hooray!  I had one blissful month of enjoying Sunday School and Relief Society before they called me to work in the nursery.  Perhaps you can see why I was far from excited about this new calling.

Perhaps you are thinking that I'm being hypocritical.  How is it fair that I can send my own child off to nursery for other people to watch, but I don't want to do the same for others?  I kind of feel like I am being a little hypocritical, but I also know that there are some people who absolutely love being in the nursery.  It's not necessarily that I don't want to give back to others, but like I mentioned before, I just feel like I do this every single day of my life.  I was really looking forward to studying for and participating in class with real, live adults.

I'm sure that this calling, like every other, is for my own personal growth.  I have never once gotten a calling and actually been upset about it, until now.  I know that it's a selfish feeling and that I need to do everything I can to serve and love and battle these feelings so that I can give my best, as well as learn and grow for myself.

They assigned me to work in the oldest nursery class, so I won't be in the same class with James, which is nice because he needs time to socialize without Mommy around.  I have a really good partner, Jessica, who also happens to be my new Visiting Teaching companion too.  I'm trying to be really optimistic, as I want to do my very best.  Perhaps I will realize what it is I'm supposed to learn or who it is I am supposed to serve.  I know that that will give me more peace and satisfaction than anything else.


Megan said...

It's hard no bones about it. I just realized today that I was released from nursery six months ago, which has flown by. I served in nursery for 2 1/2 years that didn't fly by. I am hoping that they won't keep you in that long :). It is fun when the kids in your class are excited to see you at the grocery store :).

Jessica Havican said...

hahaha I have the same feelings that you do. But who knows, maybe you will grow to love it. And it will help prepare you for James' next stage of life. It can be hard to find the hidden treasure, but I'm sure it's there somewhere. :)

BUSNINJA said...

Well, I don't know why you're in Nursery--I have been in Nursery/Primary nonstop since getting married. I know in my case it's because I'm not good with kids, and I need the practice, before my offspring is burdened with me as their father. This is certainly not the case with you. But there's always a reason, even though it's not as obvious as mine.

Kimberly said...

Nursery, that's where I am right now. I keep wondering if I have the right to ask for a new calling when I start my nanny job this fall. But then they're just going to replace me with another mom who has four kids of her own or something. . . I'll just wait until we move.

Sarah Ragatz said...

That's tough! In our ward we make sure not to call moms of young kids to be in nursery. We also have a "you only serve in nursery for one year" rule. Maybe you should move here. :) I would absolutely cry if I were called to nursery and for the first time, I would strongly consider saying no to a calling. I think you have a very positive attitude about it, really. You are trying hard to see what Heavenly Father wants you to learn from it. Thats the best attitude you could have. Keep at it. You'll be blessed. And maybe you'll even grow to like it!

Megan said...

I know exactly how you feel. Since getting married I have served in the nursery. I thought when I moved to the BYU ward I would escape it since there were only like 5 total primary workers but got it there too. I was working but taught preschool so wanted adult interaction too. Then we got called to the singles ward (even worse) then moved here and I am still working with young kids. Can't wait to go to Relief society again and have a reasonable opportunity to get to know ward members. I think it is hard to serve where you are asked and we sometimes just have to do it in faith. Good luck and I hope it doesn't last too long. I am glad it is not with James too!

Jordan and Amanda said...

You are NOT alone... I live in abject fear of a calling in nursery. I have the same thought process you do, I would have to constantly remind myself that callings are inspired (because I really do have a testimony that they are...). That being said, I wonder if Bishops ever stop and consider that young mom's are doing the toddler thing all day, and maybe for 2 hours a week would like some adult interaction.... anyway, you're definitely not alone.